April Fools: YouTube Flails, Amazon Cloud Computing In A Blimp, 3D Chrome Browsing, Google Masters A.I.

Wow. April Fools Is In full swing.

The Guardian goes all Twitter, ditching the printed version and the website. “Experts say any story can be told in 140 characters.”

Amazon launches a brand new cloud computing service called Floating Amazon Cloud Environment, or FACE. “The FACE uses durable, unmanned helium-filled blimps with a capacity of 65,536 small EC2 instances, or a proportionate number of larger instances. The top of each blimp is coated in polycrystalline solar cells which supply approximately 40% of the power needed by the servers and the on-board navigation, communication, and defense systems. “The government will have absolutely no chance of acting against them, because they will be too busy trying to decide which Federal Air Regulation (FAR) was violated, not to mention scheduling news conferences. “

Meanwhile, Google masters artificial intelligence in a post and description that’s way too geeky for me.
But they’ve created the world’s first Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity (CADIE), which is a computer that’s come alive and is making changes at Google. “Earlier today, for instance, CADIE deduced from a quick scan of the visual segment of the social web a set of online design principles from which she derived this intriguing homepage.”
Another early project for Cadie: making a 3D version of Google Chrome, since “81% of households had red/blue 3D glasses lying around.”
There’s no gentle way of putting this, but YouTube just flails with upside down video viewing.
Gmail now has AutoPilot.
Google Brain Search uses CADIE technology to index your brain.
Google Books is in on it too. See this monograph signed by the CADIE team for example.
Google Australia introduces the gBall, which will change Australian rules football as we know it.

There is also a featured YouTube video of a panda by the user ‘cadiesingularity’ with a profile stating “Cadie - the world’s first Cognitive Auto-Heuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity”.
When browsing Street View in Google Maps, a panda is shown in the bottom right map instead of the yellow person usually shown.
CADIE even has its own blog on Blogger.
There is also a “CADIE’s recommended places for humans” link in Google Maps, which leads to the “Panda Mapplet” and includes several marked locations with “CADIE’s” commentary. Under Redmond WA a link is listed which will rick roll the viewer.
Meanwhile, Identi.ca has acquired Twitter. A Twitter executive was quoted afterwards saying: “I was worried we were going to have to make a business out of that whole Twitter thing! I’m really glad it’s someone else’s problem now.”
Google is apparently also building a new $100 laptop together with Alienware (Dell). It will have a built-in brain wave reading chip, with sensors that need to be applied onto the user’s skull.
Scientists at CERN have found the cell that basically triggered the Big Bang.
The Pirate Bay sells out to Warner Bros.
There’s a new social network for your nose, a friendspace for your fragrance, a place to share your opinions on perfumes and vote for your favorite smells. They call it smellr and it’s online now.

Opera has moved on from Mouse Gestures and comes out of the closet with Face Gestures.
The entire Internet is being rebooted. (SitePoint)
Expedia is offering flights to Mars from $99. In related news, Hotels.com offers rooms on the Moon.
Add a bit of shine to your website with Laminatr.
This new Landmark jQuery plugin will alter the face of the internet.
Yahoo debuts Ideological Search.
Social Media Use Decreases Customer Satisfaction.
This brand new mobile phone works as either a coin-operated or credit/debit card mobile.
BBC’s Top Gear show comes to Hulu.
Woopra takes its Web Analytics suite up a notch and launches a webcam spy-feature for websites.
Woot is selling crap.
Reddit now looks competely like Digg (good one).

Wired: Twitter plans to make money. I’m gonna order that TW-900.
TweetDoubler gives you twice the bird.
Topify got sued by Fedex. “Fedex claims they have a registered patent for delivering faster and better email notifications and they claim we have infringed it.”
Fark now has its own social network. It looks vaguely familiar.

SocialBlade cracked Digg’s algorithm.
Epistolary Aardvark for Offline Access! “Until now, Aardvark could only be used via instant messenger or email to get answers to your questions within minutes. Through Aair Mail, you’ll be able to send questions via regular postal mail, just like you’d send a letter to a friend.”
Seacom has wired the entire African continent, which now has the fastest internet connection in the world.
LiveJournal has a Friends Page redesign project.
Microsoft added support for automatic mood detection in Windows Live Messenger. “We’re happy to announce that due to the great breakthroughs from Microsoft Research, we have an alpha version working that monitors your real-time physiological state and translates that into a mood (happy, sad, anxious, etc), such that you would never have to enter an emoticon again.”
Web celebrities (including Michael Arrington) are spotted dancing together, and they got the video to prove it.
The BDFL, having shepherded Python development for 20 years, officially announces his retirement, effective immediately. Following a unanimous vote, his replacement is named (Barry Warsaw).
Google is rumored to be acquiring Palm.
Ford, GM announce the Android Car. It looks cool.

Privacy campaigners throughout the UK have unanimously decided to support Phorm.
Daily Candy is doing their annual April Fools routine too.
How did we miss this one? CrunchGear was acquired by General Mills.
J.K. Rowling publishes Harry Potter eBooks on SmashWords.
A new mobile phone application has launched that promises to let you see where you are going while you are looking at your phone. “Called TXT’N'WALK, the application, which is available on the iPhone, Blackberry, S60 and Android operating systems will use the camera found on the back of your phone to show you the pavement in front of you while you access your email or the web on your phone.”
Qualcomm has outdone itself with the Wireless Convergence project. This one is really good.

Twitter limits tweets to one a day.
There’s also a secret government plan to tax Twitter. “Mumbrella understands that the government is planning to tax Twitter users by the number of messages they send, at a rate of 1c per tweet. This will then be multiplied by the number of followers they have.”
We think this is for April Fools, but we’re not sure: ThinkGeek is selling some cool stuff, including a ‘Unicorn Chaser’.
As of today all the newspapers, magazines and TV-channels using Twingly to link back to blogs also will show trackbacks to all emails containing links to their articles.
Funny too: Bugmenot.com now requires registration for their services. Considering the fact their tagline is “Bypass Compulsory Registration”, that’s a good one.
CafePress introduces the CafePress-o-Pedia.
Get vocal with the new Voice URL fring Add-on.
MooTools is now called jTools.
Well executed hoax: MOO.com announces the SUPER ECO FRIENDLY Business Card.
The purpose of the Conficker worm has been revealed: the network of compromised hosts will begin a massive denial-of-service attack on Web sites that do not pass validation as being fully standards-compliant.
Bigfoot discovered in Windows 7.
iPods get heavier with more music.
Google News Drone: unmanned aircrafts will cover breaking news as it happens.

EA and Gameloft’s battle of the iPhone boobs.
Kanye West gives up music for full-time blogging. Oh noes.
MassiveClouding is a new startup making internet surfers’s computers’ free memory and idle processing power leasable.
FuelMyBlog will have to be sub-divided into categories separating EU Bloggers from the rest of the world and probably sub-sub-categories so that, for instance Wales, Scotland, N. Ireland, North and South England will have their own niches, due to language and cultural differences. “Apparently sub-divisions of other member states aren’t that important.”
The British government has announced plans to provide children and teenagers living in the United Kingdom with a free customised version of the Nintendo Wii together with two games and the Wii Fit accessories.
Amiando has launched a dedicated Bavaria version of its ticketing service, complete with background music from the Munich Oktoberfest.
This company’s mission is to track down software pirates who share video games illegally. They’re looking for new bounty hunters to join their team. “If you can’t beat your enemies, beat your friends”
Just spotted on Digg: overlays featuring The Dude from the movie The Big Lebowski and many more.
Google South-Africa is opening a theme park dubbed GOOG TOWN.
Hehe. Packed3D is capable of taking an existing compiled flash game, and turn it into a fully functional 3D game. The video actually looks quite cool.
Adegga.com acquires Corkd.com
All French-made and French language films will shortly be removed from the LOVEFiLM service.
Boris from TheNextWeb has launched a TwitterFax service. “Fax any text (max 140 chars) to +31877848484 including Twitter username+password and it will post. Test it now!”
We think this is a joke: Shouttr, currently in an alpha-development stage, is a program that lets you post and read tweets others much like any other Twitter client. But it will also read aloud tweets for you as they arrive.
Newgrounds has been taken over by the Chinese government.

eBay put Skype on iPhone ‘to boost price of NSA backdoor’
Breaking: Internet Explorer 8.1 Eagle Eyes Leaked
Facebook announced yesterday an innovative partnership with telecom operators to reward heavy users with free bandwidth upgrades.
The Grama Eco Vehicle Comes With A Green Roof!
XIHA Life has acquired an island.
The BBC’s iPlayer is now available on a toaster.

From Google Maps Mania: “Top of the latest additions to the Queen’s website is this Corgi Tracker. The Queen owns five Corgis and now her loyal subjects can view their every movement thanks to this Google Map real-time tracker.”
SlideShare is faking the number of views for slideshows uploaded to the service.
The Google Sightseeing website morphed into the Ordnance Survey Sightseeing site.
Cadyou.com is proud to announce its first, free Sketchup plugin “Scanr”. In development for the 3 months, this plugin will allow you to use any optical mouse as a simple 3d scanner, enabling small objects to be scanned directly into the Sketchup software.
“When print publications started to lose circulation, we saw a golden opportunity to marry investors interested in saving newspapers with unused time on presses to bring you a new edition: TheDigitel.print.
Amazon EC3 TrueCloud
Google has acquired Mark8t.
NerdyShirts has an invisible T-shirt on sale. “It uses a fabric which bends light to render it virtually invisible. Get the warmth and comfort of a shirt without having to see it.”